Wednesday’s Wisdom: Train Yourself to Live Unapologetically in 8 Successful Steps

Intoxicating unapologetic don cheadle quote


Don Cheadle couldn’t have said it any better. It IS incredibly intoxicating when somebody is living so unapologetically who they truly are. Insatiably intoxicating in fact. But, the sad fact is that so many of us aren’t living out our essence and too many of us apologize for choices and decisions we make often to the point of even recanting statements, reneging upon decisions or back-pedalling when one disagrees with our stance or opinion. Living this way becomes exhausting, angering, frustrating, confusing, and isolating. It can even lead to an identity-crisis. 

During a coaching session today with one of my longtime clients, the word, “unapologetic” came up; a word we both have come to love and adore. We’ve been working on her personal brand (she shall remain nameless for confidentiality purposes) by outlining how she wishes to show up in the world; what her values are; as well as her life purpose. She told me that integrity and authenticity must be part of her personal brand and when we went deeper into the session, she shared what she loves about herself is living her life without fear of what others think.  And, the way this client of mine lives her life, in my personal and professional opinion, is indeed incredibly insatiably intoxicating and unapologetic—and I love it!

Today’s coaching session and a recent article I read on the elegant, engaging 85-year-old supermodel Carmen Dell’Orefice sparked the tips in today’s post on…


Training Yourself to Live Unapologetically in 8 Successful Steps

  1. Have a secret. My mother-in-law doesn’t give out her recipes even when people ask after enjoying her home-cooked meals. I freaking love this about her—it adds a bit of mystery and intrigue; people respect her SO much when she tells them “no” and that she never gives out her prized treats’ ingredients. Personally, I never tell anybody the names of the fragrances I wear. Something happens to me inside when people ask and I explain that ONLY the fragrance and I will ever know its name. 😉
  2. Rebel. We as humans get too caught up in the conventional and status quo. Sure, it’s important to have laws and procedures (I am after all a former federal officer!) but at times we can just be too literal for our own good. It’s important to rebel here and there (even against thyself!) We often think we have to wear the same clothes as our friends or do the same exact things in the same exact ways that our community members do. Bunk! Walk down the street blasting your favorite song (Some dude in the new village where I live walks around at the lunch hour literally blasting his favorite songs from his boom box—yes, a boom-box; people are fascinated by his confidence, swagger and detachment and they accept this daily entertainment); wear a tiara on your head while prancing down the street (Yep, I just saw this last week while in Rotterdam on date-night with my babe and we both said, “Cool! Good for her!); tell it like it is. This step is NOT about hurting others but to be proud in what makes uniquely you.
  3. Go wild. Yesterday, I got really angry so I ran outside to a park by my house and noticed a swing, jumped on it and just started swinging away like a kid higher and higher till my tummy felt like a gleeful child on a rollercoaster. I noticed several other adults stopping to look at me like I was crazy but I did not stop. I just kept going and going and it felt wonderfully wild! Not stopping in the middle of doing something you love, no matter how unconventional it is to others, IS living unapologetically.
  4. Don’t make others your God. During my workshops and coaching sessions, clients often say to me, “But, I can’t do that, what will my neighbors think? What will my friends think? My family will say I’m insane if I say/do/feel this or that.” My response is: Do.Not.Make.Others.Your.God. When you grant society/family/friends domain over your heart, soul and spirit, you are actually subconsciously apologizing for who you are and how you’re made up. In essence, you’re contributing to playing small in the world. The world is faaaaar more interesting when we allow all our funky shades and colors to shine; don’t make others your God; your soul will say, “Amen” when you live fearlessly authentically you.
  5. Buck your self-imposed systems. We’ve all been indoctrinated in some form or another, either by our parents, teachers, religions, cultures, rules at the job, etc. I went to Catholic school and I’m still unlearning a lot that went down in between the pews and incense. It isn’t until we are willing to stop buying-into the BS we invent in our own heads that we can live a truer, freer and more unapologetic life—which is oh-so much more fun, blissful and happy.
  6. State preferences. The people that tend to live unapologetically state what they dig and what they cannot stand without panic, anxiety, worry or fear. I love it when somebody tells me to my face what they don’t care for. Inside I’m thinking: I can trust this person. They are not afraid to tell me and others what they feel, what they like and don’t like. And, trust is crucial in today’s day-and- age. We as humans have become some accustomed to being lied to that when somebody unapologetically states a preference, we feel relieved and find it refreshing. Be the breath of fresh air we all need and pipe-up on your preferences.
  7. Stop freaking saying sorry all the time. I’m working on this myself. In fact, I think I need to carry around a “Sorry Journal” to tally the number of times I say unnecessary sorry’s. Let’s be clear: there is a BIG difference between being sorry for a harmful action you took and having empathy for others. I have found myself offering an unnecessary sorry when I’ve accidentally bumped my shoulder into somebody when what would be more appropriate would be saying something like, “Oh, excuse me, that was an accident.”  Offering unnecessary sorry’s signifies we feel we don’t belong where we are in that moment and that we are in trouble or terribly wrong. Making a mistake doesn’t mean we are wrong or should get in trouble; it simply means we are human and imperfectly perfect.
  8. Invite a little Carmen Dell’Orefice into your life. Carmen is 85, a supermodel and has MORE pictures in Vogue present-day than when she was a young supermodel in her 20’s and 30’s. She is an advocate for the ageing and unapologetically embraces her sex, looks, choices, decisions and desires. She was a model and muse for Salvador Dali; a victim of the Bernie Madhoff scandal; and shared she had several abortions (not advocating abortion here; Carmen simply did not try to hide, nor apologize, in a Daily Mail interview regarding the choices she had made in her life before keeping her one and only daughter whom she raised and loves very much). Carmen openly discusses the “hard stuff” in life yet states that she loves and lives life to the fullest—she hopes to die at the age of 100 wearing colorful high heels. No apologies.


carmen dell orefice while and white photo

Carmen Dell’Orefice. Photo credit:

It was with great pleasure to offer you today’s Wednesday’s Wisdom (thanks mama for such a cool title) and I hope to read your comments here at the blog! Yes, you may share and pay this entry and all entries forward. You’re a total star for doing so!

If you’re interested in learning more steps and successful ways to live unapologetically, shoot me an email to inquire about my services at: or hit me up at my Twitter, FB, Insta and LinkedIn pages. You can click on the social media icons at the top of the website here on the right.

In the meantime, thanks for being an Extreme Dreamer and making the world a fabulous place to traverse. I always send you my best and many blessings. Hope to connect and hear from you soon.

All suggested blog topics welcome! Send them on over :-)

Hugs from Holland,

Laurie, Certified Coach, Reiki Master, Certified LOA Practitioner 

Manifest Monday: 7 Ways We Screw Up our Manifesting Mojo

manifest image



First, a quick little worthwhile Manifest Master survey:

  • Do others say you’re hyper-sensitive? Quick-to-anger or have a short fuse?
  • Do you feel you’ve got it in you to make your dreams come true but somehow you just keep falling a bit short and don’t know exactly why?
  • Are you often referred to as a dreamer? Or that your
    head is in the clouds?”
  • Do you feel misunderstood or unaccepted because you see or experience things differently than others?


If you answered “yes” to one (1) or all of the above questions, GREAT! You’ve got what it takes to master the power of personal and professional manifestation despite what you or others believe. In fact, you possess the very magic to bring all you desire to life. I know, I know, you’re thinking, What are you talking about, Laurie? Have you gone mad?

Hang in there with me. Trust me for a moment and you’ll see why. Please keep reading.  :-)

Many believe life just simply happens. Or, it happens TO them (rather than FOR them or in-service of them)…

I was one of those people years ago. In fact, I often said if I didn’t have bad luck, I’d have no luck at all.

That’s not to say I wasn’t a goal-setter or go-getter but I lacked vision, the power of manifesting my dreams, as well as the ability to tap into the power of my positive feeling. Yes, feeling (there’s so much more than just positive-thinking). Do YOU feel me?

But, I sure was an expert on how to access my negative feelings. In fact, I was a master at it. I’d complain for days till my friends and family told me they no longer wanted to listen to me. I fell into the same thinking as my former co-workers and I’d even yell at the television when something radically upset me. 

Have any of these experiences  ever happened to you?

Misunderstood, loneliness and unaccepted were feelings I often felt. Knowing I wanted something greater in life but not knowing how to make that happen felt freakishly frustrating and drastically debilitating. Sadly, I often curbed my enthusiasm and allowed my passion to peter-out just for the sake of toning down my energy so others could “be” with me and not feel overwhelmed.

Any of this sound or feel familiar?


The good news is: It’s not too late. If you’ve got EXTREME passion, you’re already on the right track. Many may not understand your powerful passion but that does NOT mean you are wrong. It does not mean you cannot manifest. It does not mean your Extreme Dreams won’t come true.  In fact, that powerful passion you possess is the EXACT ingredient required to be a “Master Manifester.” 

We’ve just got to get you making that passion more PURPOSEFUL. Simple. As. That.

If you think about the most powerful master manifesters on our incredible planet, many of them have often been called, “loners,” “aliens,” “weird,” “oddball,” “scary,” and most of them have been terribly underestimated. Again, GREAT news, right?!?

Today’s post is designed to SHOW you how to actually streamline, anchor in, and center your passion so you can catapult your dreams to the next level. Gone are the days of your passion just indiscriminantly being thrown all over the place—we’ve got to get it dialed-in, channeled and directed.  Usually, us hyper-sensitive folks are simply challenged with not knowing how to get our passion “right.” But, once we’ve figured out how, the rest is literally a piece-of- cake.

In the past (and sometimes still!), I let my emotions get the best of me instead of using my emotions to their best. Impulsive, intense and even irrational were very descriptive words others would say about me. At first I didn’t get why others said such things, but boy-oh-boy do I get it now! While I found such expressions painful and hurtful, I can look back and have some giggles over my past piss-and-vinegar personality.

While I knew I had a lot of passion and it was (and still is) fiery,  I often unloaded that fire onto others because I hadn’t mastered my blaze. Sadly, a lot of my dreams got burned away, many others were hurt or offended, and I wasted a lot of time because I didn’t understand how to successfully utilize the power of my energetic enthusiasm and excited emotions.

I don’t want this for you. Let’s save you loads of time and get you started on mastering what you wish to manifest in a much easier and far-more fun way. Right. Freaking. Now. Deal?


Here’s a quick list of just a few of the things I’ve gained over a 13-year period (I started actively working on magically manifesting in 2000)  since I began “channeled manifesting” which you, too, can bring about if you desire (and keep in mind, I answered “yes” to ALL of the above-listed questions in the survey at the beginning of this post:

  • World travel (from Nepal, to Turkey, to Bali, Thailand, Italy, England, France, Belgium, Morocco, Egypt, Jordan, Kurdistan, Lebanon and so much more)
  • Living abroad (have lived in Spain, Portugal, The Middle East, Africa and now The Netherlands)
  • Working for myself in several different countries doing what I love (coaching, training and Reiki)
  • Working only about the equivalent of six (6) months out of the year but earning the equivalent of a 12-month income
  • Working shorter days (as opposed to well over 40 hours per week in my old government career plus one helluva long commute to boot)
  • Working with ONLY my only my ideal clients
  • Having tons more fun with a lot less anguish, sadness and pain and a helluva lot more peace of mind and calm


And, now, let’s get to YOU.


Be still, the answer will come. -Abraham-Hicks


crystal clear flower water drop image


  1. Anger is a creative channeling force. Remember the survey at the beginning of this post? If you answered that you are often told you have a short-fuse, don’t despair. Anger is a gauge; it’s a guide to what we are feeling at our deepest core level. Usually anger ignites in us as our intuition is being tapped into on some major level. The key is to, however, know how to channel that anger rather than let it just run amuck and spill onto everyone around you. Channel that anger instead into your dreams, your passions, your hobbies and desires. Anger possesses inside it a lot of fuel, power and energy. It’s important to use this fuel, power and energy at its most optimal level. When you can master this, your passion becomes centered and very directed, which means your dreams can and will finally take flight. Most master manifesters are not scared or ashamed of their anger. Most use it wisely and to their advantage without taking advantage of others. A good check-in question regarding anger is: How can I use this anger for my and the highest good of all?
  2. Doubt is cool. Doubting isn’t bad despite what many say. It gives you a chance to pause, sit with stillness and gain new ground regarding what feels most important to you. Having quick moments of doubt can provide the clarity you’re seeking. The key is not to get too sucked into the doubt and allow it to take over. Grant yourself permission to have moments of doubt but also become aware of when you’ve let doubt win. A good check-in question regarding doubt is: How long have I sat with this doubt without taking any action?
  3. Expect miracles AND expect to work. When I first started learning the Universal Laws, I became obsessed with the idea of everything being super-duper easy and that I no longer really had to work. I think this is a misconception that many of us have especially when first learning the Law of Attraction. Many of us create Vision Boards and then just expect the car, man or woman, and job of our dreams to simply magically appear. Vision boards alone don’t bring the bacon. I believe those of us teaching the Law of Attraction aren’t being clear if we give others this impression. Yes, expect miracles to come as they surely do and also expect from yourself that you will always give your best for the highest good at all times whenever possible and that you, too, will roll up your sleeves and do the work especially when it comes to doing what you love, loving what you do and getting paid for it. Here’s what I’ve learned: When channeling all of my efforts, love, pride, enthusiasm, and energy into my dreams and passions—it NEVER feels like work. A good check-in question on expecting to work: What are my personal expectations of myself when it comes to manifesting my dreams?
  4. Rest is key. While it is important to take intentioned action toward all things positive that have to do with manifesting our dreams, it is soooo important to REST. Resting is the place where our daydreams can happen. And daydreams are the spark to the Extreme Dreams! Resting provides the opportunity for us to imagine, create, innovate while seeing and feeling positive images in our minds FIRST before we take that directed, channeled action with purpose toward our passions. Rest is not bad. Please believe me when I tell you: Rest is NOT bad. We have a lot of noise in our brains which happens when we don’t give our minds the time to just chill out and reset itself. Our mind is one of our greatest assets to mastering manifestation so it is supa-dupa important to give it the time to just pause-out. A good check-in question regarding rest is: What makes me not take rest?201009-omag-beck-600x411
  5. Feel what you see and give it time. When learning the power of visualization, most don’t realize we have to invoke the senses—this means invite images of smell, touch, taste, hearing, etc. See and feel yourself tasting your favorite dishes while visualizing, or actually see and feel yourself sleeping in your favorite bed in your favorite room in your new house smelling all the aromas, seeing all the colors, etc.—if that is what you’re manifesting. Feel the sheets, touch the knick-knacks in your visualized room—you get the idea. Most give up on visualizing too easy. I believe this is because they are not finding the fun in it and are filtering their imaginations. Make your visualizations as ACTIVE as you can—make them FEEL as real as you can. Do them often and do them in SHORT intervals. One minute of visualizing each day can do wonders. And, don’t forget to BELIEVE in your visualization. A good check-in question regarding visualization: What do I love about doing my visualization work?
  6. Don’t avoid negative feelings either. When I first started to learn the power of manifesting I thought I couldn’t have one bad or negative thought. This is totally not practical or realistic. I’d automatically tell myself: You have to think positively now. You must change your thoughts immediately, Laurie. It’s bad to think negative thoughts. Has this happened to you also? The Law of Attraction does not say we cannot have bad thoughts or that we won’t think negatively at times. In fact, I highly encourage you to read or re-read, Ask and It is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks and review the Emotional Guidance Scale (in my book it is on pages 113-114). You will see in the book and on the scale that you are actually granted permission to feel depressed, for example, yet are encouraged to get “underneath” that depression by trying to see if you can increase your vibration up a notch to insecurity and then up another notch to jealousy, etc. Bad thoughts don’t mean you’re bad; they only mean it is time to rest, reflect, recharge and rebuild. A good check-in question regarding avoidance is: What feelings do I try to escape; what happens when I avoid these feelings?

The thing that matters most is that you consciously reach for a feeling that is improved. The word for the feeling is not important. -Abraham-Hicks



7. Appreciate the hate. Bold weird statement, I know. The message here is to even appreciate that which doesn’t fit with us or doesn’t resonate. There’s a message and lesson tucked inside this uncomfortable situation. Ideally, if you can appreciate what you don’t jibe with, you’re totally mastering your emotions and channeling that hatred into a positive place rather than just allowing your “fired-up” fire to fly free. When you’re the person holding the match rather than allowing the fire to simply ignite you, you’ll see you’re truly manifesting all you desire because you can master even the toughest of times. And, this is the key to not screwing up your manifesting mojo.


Thank you for being an Extreme Dreamer and sharing your energy with us. Thanks for giving yourself the time to read this post. I do hope these 7 Tips today gave you some hope, happiness, and validation.

I would love to hear from you regarding what resonated with you; your comments are always welcome. I send you lots of blessings, abundance and light— some extra fuel to help you have lift-off for your Extreme Dreams! Every little bit helps 😉


Please feel free to share this post and blog with your friends, loved ones, acquaintances or colleagues—we never know who may benefit from our shares.


Also, please touch base with me at Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and Twitter—I’d love for you to see the new house with the fur-babes in The Netherlands; there’s lots of pics to see there. Just click on the icons at the top-right corner here at the website, to connect with me and I promise to connect with you, too.


In the meantime, if you have any questions or would like additional information regarding Extreme Dream Training’s services, feel free to email me at: I can’t wait to connect!


Have a powerful and exciting day :-) Now, let’s get manifesting you master you!


Hugs from Holland,



Founder of Extreme Dream Training, Certified Life Coach, Reiki Master, Fish! Philosophy Facilitator, EFQM Assessor

Feel Good Friday: 6 Simple Secrets to Happiness

Everybody loves Fridays. In the west, we know it means the weekend is coming. And, in many other cultures, it actually begins the first day of the weekend as is the case in the Arabian gulf and other parts of North Africa, for example. No matter how you slice it, Friday pretty much is a good-news day. Keeping the theme of “feeling good” alive, let’s go over some fun, funky, and unique ways you can incorporate more yumminess into your life by unlocking the secrets to harmonious happiness in the tips below.




If you want to become happy, be. -Leo Tolstoy

6 Simple Secrets to Happiness

  1. Wake up your brain. Many people feel groggy and lethargic after waking up in the morning. And, this feeling of sluggishness can carry through to the rest of the day. Many try to combat this fatigue with several cups of coffee but would you believe this is not necessary? All you have to do is brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand! Your brain is not accustomed to brushing your teeth with your non-dominant hand and therefore must laser-in and truly focus. This extreme concentration wakes up the brain and gets you feeling more “in” your body. Give it a try for a few days and notice the difference: You will feel more alert and awake which will give you more power throughout the day.
  2. Schedule time each day to do something spontaneous. Blocking out an hour or two (in your calendar) for free/play time ensures you will create the space to do something zany, wild, fun and/or new each day. This perks you up, boosts the spirit and reduces stress.
  3. Remember recess. As a kid we had favorite games, activities, daydreams and exercises we freely participated in each day. And, most of us loved doing these things at recess. Draw upon your favorite kid activities and do them each day. Whether it is coloring, painting, playing dress-up, hide-and-seek or just plain doodling, get to it. You’ll feel younger, happier and more joyful.
  4. Write down 5 things you adore about yourself. Keep a “self” journal to “contain” all the things you absolutely love about yourself. Start each day by re-reading past journal entries, as well as, writing in new passages about your prized talents, abilities, skills, mindset and achievements. You will feel like a winner and have more confidence.
  5. Stop self-bullying. Tune into how you talk to yourself each day. Notice the threads of statements you make and have some affirmations at-the-ready to combat bully-talk. (Don’t know what affirmations are? Contact me and I will share with you how they can increase your happiness factor.) Write down the negative bullying comments you make to yourself so you can recognize what they sound like and how often you say them to yourself. Practice turnaround statements by thought-stopping and replace abusive self-statements with positive opposing statements of success. (Not sure how to do turnaround statements—email me and I will show you how.)
  6. Sweet tooth linger. If you have a favorite dessert or candy, you don’t have to cut it out of your diet. Simply take a bite of that delicious goodness and let it sit in your mouth. Savor the flavor and curb the urge to overeat. You get the best of both worlds: eating what you’d like without overdoing it.




As always, thank you so much for being part of the Extreme Dream community—you make this place so much better! That’s it for today’s blog but I’d love to hear from you on suggested topics you’d like to read about here at the Extreme Dream blog so drop me a line at


In the meantime, make it a Feel-Good-Friday!

I’d love to hear what you thought of these 6 Simple Secrets I’ve been practicing with my loved ones, on myself and with my Life Coaching clients here in the comments section at the Extreme Dream blog. I always do my best to respond to each and every comment so please don’t be shy! Also, I encourage you to make somebody else’s Friday feel good by sharing this post with them. Sharing is indeed caring. :-)


Hey! Also, I’d love to be friends with you at Facebook, Twitter and to connect with you at LinkedIn and Instagram. Feel free to click the icons here at the top right corner at!


Have a fab Friday and hugs from Holland,


Laurie, Certified Life Coach, Master Reiki Practitioner, Certified Law of Attraction Expert, EFQM Assessor

Instagram: @ExtremeDreamTraining

Kick Stress Out of Your Life the Extreme Dream Way: 10 Tips to Bliss

Stress-busting-tips pics

Recently I’ve moved from the Middle East to The Netherlands. Studies show that moving along with changing jobs or starting a new career can be some of the most stressful undertakings we humans endure. I concur. Now that the most difficult part of the move is over (which also entailed getting my fur-babes over to Europe), I’ve found myself stressing over stuff that’s a little less tangible: having less to do; not having a car; getting a bike as the Dutchies do and making that my main mode of transport; and wondering what exactly to do with myself when I have more time on my hands.

As most of you know, I conduct coaching and training workshops in many sectors including Oil & Gas, Financial, Telecommunications, and Science and Health. With all this new stress (imagined or not) going around, I figured the best thing to do was look back over manuals I had created for my participants in past workshops.


Here are some tips I’ve gathered to help you when the stress gets a bit too much.



Kick Stress Out of  Your Life the Extreme Dream Way: 10 Tips to Bliss

  1. Get out of bed slowly (no Facebook check-ins…yet). Stretch while still in the bed. Roll over to one side. Hang on on your side for awhile while taking deep breaths. Gradually lift yourself up. When we start our day with a “start,” we give our heart a “start” and that’s how our whole day will be played out.
  2. Eat breakfast slowly (still no technology, sorry. Trust me, wait on it). No tv. No phone. Just you and the best meal of the day. Chew each bite till it becomes liquid in your mouth (an old Hindu technique to aid with digestion) and slowly swallow. You’re setting up your nervous system and digestive tract to be receptive to all good things throughout the day—so you’re starting your day off right!
  3. Talk to your mind. Tell your mind you’re working on things and have things handled. The mind is what makes stress grow so you’ve got to have some coaching talks with yourself so you can master the stress. Tell your mind things like, “I don’t have time to dwell on the stress but I promise I’m working with it.
  4. Take a walk outdoors. Ipod optional. Look around. Get out of your head. Notice the others walking along the path. Take your shoes off and walk in the grass. Breathe deep belly breaths.
  5. Mindfulness coloring books. Get some. You can find them in bookshops and don’t forget the colored pencils. Curl up on the couch or go outside and sit on the grass and color away.They really work.
  6. Stop the shop. Try not to engage in shopping therapy. You’ll only regret what you’ve spent and end up more stressed later. Instead, go to a cafe, sip some tea and people-watch. This little event will make you feel you’re doing something and will slow your mind down. Plus, fresh hot tea is always good.
  7. Heel-toe it. Do the mindfulness walk where you take your back foot and touch your toe to the heel of your front foot. Alternate. Do this for as long as you can. This practice gets you in your body, helps you focus and it takes time.
  8. Chant. Chanting “Om” while sitting in Lotus cleanses your mind, body and spirit and it reduces stress significantly.
  9. Do Reiki on yourself or indulge in some sessions. Dr. Oz is a huge fan of Reiki—he even introduced Reiki healers into his surgical unit 15 years ago to conduct sessions on his breast cancer patients, and it was discovered many of them reduced their stress significantly due to Reiki. Reiki refreshes, rejuvenates and rebuilds.
  10. Read. Read tips like these. Subscribe to inspirational quotes and blogs. Step out of yourself and see how others successfully handle stress. You’ll realize you’re not alone and that validation will help you through the tough times.




Dear Stress, let’s break up. -Anonymous

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Thanks for tuning-in. If these tips helped you out, I’d love to hear about it! Feel free to share your comments here at the blog and let’s engage. Also, you’re always more-than-welcome to share the blog, tips and newsletters with your friends. Let’s put more good in the world. Thank you for being an Extreme Dream member.


Hugs from Holland,


Laurie, Certified Coach, Reiki Master, Certified Law of Attraction Expert

13 Ways to Have More Moolah in the Bank, Without Becoming a Millionaire

Lately, I’ve noticed a tremendous amount of posts entitled, “How to Become a Millionaire,” “10 Daily Habits That Will Make You a Millionaire,” and/or, “This is What You Need to Do to Become a Millionaire.” These blog posts may sound intriguing, and may even pump you up to get on the millionaire bandwagon, but I have found all these reactions are rather illusory and temporary.  You may get excited for a few days, and then reality creeps in.

After seeing these millionaire articles on Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter feeds daily, it suddenly dawned on me that it was rare to find articles on how to work toward attracting a six-figure income AND how to make it happen. Also, to be honest, I think it’s more doable, feasible and a bit more responsible to share with you steps on how to achieve this goal over the long-term. [Read more…]

5 Things Lasting Leaders Refuse to Do

At the age of 24, I became a Probation Officer for the County of Alameda in the city of Oakland, California. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, I couldn’t wait to start my new career. I wasn’t necessarily “fresh out of college,” as I had graduated two years prior with a Bachelor of Science in Anthropology but this was my first real job as up till that point, I’d been supporting myself as a professional make-up artist. I know, major jump from fashion to crime-stopping.

On my first day reporting to the Probation Center, I was immediately told I did not have a supervisor and that nobody was sure when I would have one. Also, I was informed I did not have an official caseload and nobody knew what types of offenders I would even end up supervising. In the interim, I had three (3) separate supervisors I would report to and five (5) “low” cases to supervise, which meant low-offending criminals who more-than-likely committed a burglary, sold some pot or possibly was a first-time offender at the time. Months went by reporting to these three separate supervisors who in essence, started to be at odds with each other regarding the various conflicting instructions they each were giving me. [Read more…]

8 Toxic Phrases to Never Say to Yourself (or Others)

As we enter the second month of this 2016 year, it’s easy to get down on ourselves if we haven’t yet gotten started on our resolutions, goals or dreams. Before you know it, we’re beating ourselves up, getting down on ourselves, and becoming our worst enemy. Unfortunately, once we enter this cycle of “self-bullying”, it’s very difficult to break these painful patterns that prevent us from heading in the direction we truly desire to go. Too often, we don’t realize that the phrases we silently say to ourselves may be actually hurting us to the point of self-sabotage. We may even tell ourselves that these self-defeating phrases are “no big deal”, or that “everybody talks like this to themselves”. But, the truth is, the truly successful, truly happy, and truly effective individuals in our society do everything in their power to overcome their demons by making a conscientious effort to replace “stinking thinking” with more purposeful phrases that serve them instead of cost them their dreams, visions and plans. In today’s blog post, we’re outlining some common phrases that may seem benign but that could actually keep you from realizing your actual potential. As Ice Cube so poignantly put it: Check Yo’self Before You Wreck Yourself. 😉

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6 Ways to Turn Setbacks Into Success

As you start settling into 2016, you may have been experiencing some rueful reflection regarding 2015. Pretty much everybody I’ve dealt with over the past year has shared what a challenging, topsy-turvy 365 days it was, myself included! From a Co-Active Coaching perspective, however, there are many ways to “move through the muck” and make something truly powerful out of those tough times. Consider exploring these six (6) ways to turn your setbacks into actual successes with very little effort.  [Read more…]

Privacy is Purposeful—15 Proven Ways to Get in More “Me” Time (even if you’re a mommy or daddy)

I have to admit, I had to force myself to stop at 15 tips and not go overboard as this topic is near-and-dear to my heart; I’m a sucker for me-time. In fact, I can’t get quite enough of it.

As a busy businesswoman, I’ve learned over the years that if I don’t get my quiet time, err, I’m a tad cranky and crabby. Okay, a lot crabby and cranky.

The older I’ve gotten and the longer I’ve had my business, the more I’ve realized that privacy is so purposeful. It brings focus, clarity, good health, less sickness, less stress, creativity, inspiration, innovation, connection to self and ideas, and more productivity and purpose. [Read more…]